BlackwaterDnD

Em:
Welcome to BlackwaterDnD, where good friends tell better stories. This series, Balance, is a miniseries using the Powered by the Apocalypse system, Godkiller, which was created by Connie Chang, now available on Itch.io for purchase, and is proudly sponsored by Hero Forge and Moonbeam. This tale takes us back, long before the end of the universe, to a time when we begin to explore & understand old divine wounds that run so very deep, and what happens when love is caught in the middle. This story encouraged us as creators to strive for genuine emotion and connection, relish the space we create at the table, and take big swings with the way we approached our narrative. For this story, your GOD, everyone else, and the thrum of the Cradle, is myself, Em Carlson, and my GODKILLERs are played by Gina Susanna & Jannes Wessels. As this game falls within a holypunk and dark fantasy genre, it may contain themes and depictions that are triggering for some listeners. Please take care of yourself and access safe support as you see fit.

Content warnings for this episode include: fear // allusions to mass death // knives as weapons // murder // allusions to systems of oppression & class struggle // religious overtones

So sit back and relax, heretics. And welcome to Godkiller: Balance.

Episode 13: Amending

Em:
Issilus fades quietly, her body weight gently transferring onto you, Rake, as the life leaves her. She does not bleed outwardly onto you. Time, apparently, has held that too, but the damage dealt is the knife dug deep into her chest as you drew her in closer to you, wrapping her arms around you. That is real. You feel the last of the warm air of her breath near your neck, as you feel her well and truly die. And while you don't see her soul depart, you feel it go. Maybe because of the essence of the Matron and the Mistress, and Nepthysaket, are all blurred here, shifting and in flux. Maybe with how Issilus tried to right her wrong in the end. You get the sense that, and you hope that, she finds her way to the river. If she wishes. You look around, and it is a din of quiet. The silence is almost so loud. And yet, you hear a soft ticking sound coming from the archway. You know you don't have long here, and your time calls you back for matters most pressing. What would you like to do?

Jannes (as Rake):
“We should go. We've got what we came for.”

Gina:
Are you still holding Issilus?

Jannes:
I think at this point, Rake would have lowered her back to the ground, and sort of be… Kneeling next to her, placing her hands sort of folded across her chest, and just sort of arranging her, in, sort of more dignified position.

Em:
Is the knife still in her chest?

Jannes:
I think he would leave it there, I don't think he wants anything to do with the knife.

Em:
Hmm. As you move her arms across her chest, focusing on her and trying not to look at the knife, your arm brushes against it. And you ache. You feel that same pang that you felt when you were fourteen. You felt that same pang that you felt in the bar, from Kian. It doesn't make you nauseous, it is just a blade, but it was a Eutochian blade at some point. This knife and your father's knife, the one that you hold now, come from the same origin despite the fact that they look so very different. Both corrupted. Both altered. And both turned towards killing gods other than Archeveleon. You may not know him as Archeveleon, but you heard Kian talk about The Empty God. And I think you'd be able to put that together.

Jannes:
I think Rake would, when he's done arranging her hands and laying her down, I think he would look for the raven skull that she used as her focus.

Em:
Mm.

Jannes:
And I think he would take that.

Em:
Easy enough to find. You look over at her sleeves, larger and bell-shaped, and you see the sharp slices across her palms so that she could draw her own blood to start the ritual to summon the Mistress in the first place. And you gently reach inside, and you find on a small chain, it tucked inside her sleeve. It fits comfortably in the palm of your hand. Its beak, stained with what looks to be two types of blood, but you saw that as well.

Jannes (as Rake):
“We should, we should go.”

Gina:
I've been watching Rake this whole time, as he's moved her, as he's arranged her arms, and taken the raven skull, and, I know you've killed before, I've seen you do it. But this is different. And I look you over and I think, without even knowing what I'm doing, I… I move to you, and I pull you into a hug.

Gina (as Ever):
“Are you alright?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“I've… I've never... I've never killed anyone, where after I've felt no guilt. I just wish… I just wish maybe we'd gotten here sooner. Maybe we could have prevented it all.”

Gina:
I pull back enough to look at you.

Gina (as Ever):
“Look, I know we said… I understand if what we need to do... you don't... if it would be… after what we saw. And the Matron, seeing your mother like that... I can't imagine what… I understand if it would be difficult to do… What we need to do.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“The person we saw is not my mother. I think the person that we saw died a long time ago. My mother is… Something completely different. I don't want to do what we have to do because… because of any sort of… Vengeance or vendetta. That's the way it started, but that's not the reason anymore. Now it's about protecting you, and… There is no other way to protect you. She will never let you go.”

Gina (as Ever):
“But what if… I just, I wish there was another way. We'll do this together. And if there's something that you… If we get there to, to wherever we are, and it's time, and you can't bring yourself to… I trust you to make the right choice. Because as much as she's hurt you and used you, she's still your mother. What a mortal thing, to love someone even when we know we… Even when it's complicated.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“If… If I was to ask you the same thing that Issilus asked of me…”

Gina (as Ever):
“Rake, I…”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Would you be able to?”

Gina (as Ever):
“That's not gonna happen. Why would you... Would you want me to?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“I don't, I don’t want to die. I just…”

Gina (as Ever):
“Why are you asking me this?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“I just want to know that… If in the end, it's a choice between me and you, and I choose… I just want to know if you would be able to do it. I need to know that you want to protect yourself as much as I want to protect you.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Of course I want to protect myself but… That’s not going to happen. We won't have that choice. It's not going to be that choice.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Okay.”

Gina (as Ever):
“It's not. Right? We have a plan. We have… We have a plan. It’s going to work.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“I think we have everything we need from here.”

Gina:
I look down at the knife, still in Issilus’s chest.

Gina (as Ever):
“Do think we should bring that?”

Em:
You feel a pull towards it, an ache in your hand, where the black mark was that you saw in the Dreamscape. You want that knife in your hand the same way you wanted Rake's knife in your hand. There’s a bit of a hum that sits just below audible. Almost like the two blades are oscillating against each other. With each other.

Gina (as Ever):
“It feels important.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“It was, it was important.”

Gina (as Ever):
“We know- we know it's been used against her before. I know we're not trying to kill her. Maybe we should bring it with us just in case? Maybe that's why? Maybe we're meant to have it.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Alright. But, I don't think one of us should carry both at the same time.”

Gina (as Ever):
“No. I can- I can take this one.”

Gina:
And I'll move the body, and reach for the knife.

Em:
Okay. You grip the knife on its handle. Your hand wrapping around. Feeling the hilt. Smooth, cold steel. And that acrid smell. You see drops of the green ooze next to the entrance wound. And you get the strong sense that you should not touch that. If you can avoid it. Red crystal, weaving in and out of a dark pewter. Runes etched into the blade. There's a draw to it. Just like your eyes did with the scar on your hand, that chasm. It's so dark. An emptiness to it. You feel like you could fall into it. And as you close your hand around it, you hear the rattle of chains. They don't come to grip you yet. And you know from what you've seen, that the god Issilus follows is long dead. It won't come for you the way it did for her. But it echoes. Everything in the universe has echoes. The ghost of a long dead god is bound to this blade. It feels comfortable in your hand as you slowly begin to remove it from her chest. And this knife wants to show you something. How would you like to do that? If at all.

Gina:
He wants to show me something… I think I'll use a move of, renowned move, the vagabond.

Em:
Okay.

Gina:
Since I have spared a god.

Em:
Mmhmm.

Gina (as Ever):
And I feel like there's something more to be known here. I think I'll ask, what isn't it telling me? What is there to know?

Em:
Mmm. The knife becomes fully free of Issilus as you draw it backward. As you stare down looking at it, you get a flash. You saw the rift that Nepthysaket opened to take the Matron. So you could recognize one if you saw one. And in this moment, your vision is taken and you feel… something projected, kind of inside your mind. A vast desert full of sand, a ruined, desecrated city, a crumbling castle. And a rift, a hundred, two hundred feet high. Open to the Abyss itself. You see a group of people fighting to close it. You see one walk into it, willingly. And you feel it start to close, collapse on itself from the inside out. You see the person who walked in fly backward. Shoved out of the rift, landing on their back in the sand. You don't see them clearly, because that's not what you're here to see. As the rift itself starts to close, you hear the flapping of strong wings. Feather and metallic. And with maybe, five or six feet to spare, you see the Matron holding this knife, flying at an impossible speed towards the rift to the Abyss. As she hurtles into it, as the rift closes behind her. And while you don't see what happens, you hear screaming, deep, guttural screaming, bigger than a person, bigger than hundreds of people. You hear the screams of a god dying and rattling against its chains. You see her, whirling and flying, almost being torn apart by the Abyss itself, but not until her work is done. You see her chest heaving as she pants. As the eye of Tharakus closes, and is pulled deeper and deeper into the black, dark, cavernous expanse of the Abyss. Thousands and thousands of demonic hands, ripping and tearing and pulling, the chains rattling louder and louder, the guttural screams still echoing, even though they have stopped. You see her look around. Her job done. And you see her shoulders drop. It is an odd moment of humanity that is quickly gone, as she takes off like a rocket, and the vision fades, then you come back to yourself.

Jannes:
Do I notice her, or is it over so quickly that I don't even pick up on it?

Em:
You do. She is stock still, her eyes kind of glaze over, for well over a minute, before she comes back to herself.

Jannes:
When you regain your senses you find that the orientation of things is slightly different. He's no longer standing to the side, he would have moved to you and knelt beside you, and placed an arm on your, or a hand on your shoulder. And when you come to...

[Ever softly gasps]

Jannes (as Rake):
“Are you alright?”

Gina (as Ever):
“Yes. Yes, um... She... It was her. The Matron, she…”

Gina:
And I look down at the knife in my hand.

Gina (as Ever):
“She killed Tharakus. With this.”

Em:
And that strikes you, Rake. Pulling back to what you remember Knave saying. When it met you in its strange version of that liminal dream space. You remember your mother saying that she couldn't kill anyone by her own hand. Perhaps she also needs that knife too.

Jannes (as Rake):
“I… I don't know if taking this knife back to when we're from is a good idea.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Why not?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“My mother had said that the only… But she was not capable of… Of killing a god. And… If she'd done it before. With this knife, maybe the only reason she's not capable of doing it now is because she no longer has this knife. If we bring this knife back to her. then who knows what she could do.”

Gina (as Ever):
“This is something she wants. Perhaps even more than Nepthysaket herself.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“If our plan goes wrong, and she ends up with this knife...”

Gina (as Ever):
“How do we know she doesn't already have it?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Because then she would not have made the other. There would have been no need for me. No need for you.”

Gina (as Ever):
“I can't imagine that leaving it here just causes it to disappear altogether. This is the past, it's not… Something must have happened to it. But I hear what you're saying.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“We... we can take it. You're right. I don't think there's anything that will work as better bait than the knife. But the risk just becomes much larger than just our lives. It becomes the lives of all the gods that are left. Regardless, we should go. I feel my ability to keep this moment stopped, is waning.”

Em:
Tick, tock, tick, tock.

Jannes (as Rake):
“I don't know how much time I have, I can keep this bubble up.”

Gina:
I, I stand up. And I look around, is... Everything is stopped?

Em:
Everything. The rift, Nepthysaket attempting to shield herself from the divine radiation. Bast's body lying on the ground, you see soldiers fighting, further off. You see even the Titans themselves in attempts to flee. Garrick's halfway up in the sky, Istichia pulling herself over a mountain.

Gina:
I look over all of that, but my eyes keep coming back. To Nepthysaket. And I turn my head toward Rake, but my eyes stay on Nepthysaket, and I say,

Gina (as Ever):
“Just, just one more thing.”

Gina:
And I move to her. And I can still hear her scream reverberating in my mind. Trying to stop the bleeding, trying to do whatever she can, and it's not enough. Trying to fix her, and it's not enough. And there's a wrenching in my chest as I get close. And I, I think I'd like to pray for guidance.

Em:
Interesting. So when you pray for guidance, name the aid you seek and answer one. The GM will describe the aid that actually comes as they answer the other. So, what are you seeking here?

Gina:
The aid I seek is... I know that right now, with time stopped, she can't hear me. But I also know that when we leave here, when we go back, we need to find her again. I want her to know why it's so important that we find her. That we need her help, that, that I don't. That I need her. And I hope. I don't know if this will work, but I hope that the god that answers my prayer is Nepthysaket herself.

Em:
You wish to speak to the mortal version of her? This one?

Gina:
I want her to be able to hear me even if… I don't know if that would involve stopping time or if the ascended Nepthysaket from our time can just allow a bit of… A thinning of this veil, in a way, so that she'll know what I have to tell her once we're gone.

Em:
So I'm gonna tell you what unclear omens or visions besiege you. And then I'm gonna tell you what divine move you wanna use to try and make this happen. Okay. Because I think this is really fascinating. As you reach out to her, your mind already pulled into a space open for visions, by what you just experienced, Eternal's Undoing still in your hands as you walk towards her. Things seem to fast forward in front of you, not actually. The time stop that Rake pulled is holding. But you get the chance to see what happens after. If you hadn't have intervened. Issilus remains pinned beneath Bast, the great panther. The rift closes. And a monumental wave of energy tears out from it, beginning to obliterate everything in its path. Anything living here on Manta is turned to dust. Skin stripped from bone in a fraction of a second. The Titans manage to get themselves out, using every ounce of their elemental power to retreat, to save themselves. Everyone and everything here in Manta dies. Nothing but bones and old stone remain. The mask of the Feathered Mistress shatters, falling onto the ground. Thall Bask takes the brunt of the blow, the bright verdance of the tree beginning to wisp away into smoke and ash, but the trunk holds firm. You get an essence of divinity off the tree. Tethered to something much bigger than nature itself.

You see the tree begin to grow around Nepthysaket. You don't know why, but it does so. It encases her, and pulls her into the bark, shielding her. Manta becomes a wasteland. Time goes by. A year, two, five, ten, twenty-five. Fifty years pass and Manta stays the same. The land bridge that connects Manta to the mainland continent is flooded by Istichia. Wanting to hide it away. Wanting to hide it away, and hide her own shame from failure. The Dawn War rages on. No one comes, not to investigate or see if anyone remains. No one. Time begins to forget Manta as the world moves on. And then we see Thall Bask, this tree itself begin to fade, the rest of the colour draining from it until it's nothing more than a husk. And as the bark begins to peel backward, something falls out. A body slumps to the ground. Nepthysaket. Looking the same as you saw her previously, carrying a small green bow from the tree, cradled in her arms. Uninjured, save for the scarring across her body from the radiation. She is still for a long while. Could be days or weeks. The skies move, but there is no wind or rain. No weather would dare touch this place. It just waits. And then slowly she begins to stir. Around midday we see her eyes flutter open and she pulls herself to standing. Whirling around as we see her begin to cry. She begins to yell and scream the anguish so plain on her face, you can't hear it, you just see it. We see her run and search and scour the city, finding nothing. No one, except miles and miles of death. She stays with the tree for another while, checking on the bow she has, tending to it.

Until one day she gets up, and begins to move with purpose. Time fast forwards as we see her begin to work, methodical, planned, practiced, as she begins to give rites to the city of Manta. Every bone or skull, every life honoured. Sparing little time for rest, creating her own food and water to eat, she spends the next one hundred years tending to what remains of the city, and begins to construct a tomb, deep underground below the city, for the goddess she lost. Nothing forgotten, nothing left behind, an act of true atonement. Once her work was complete, the tomb of the Feathered Mistress pulled closed, only then did she leave Manta.

We move through the next phases of Nepthysaket's life. She takes the bow to another continent far away and plants it, staying with the tree for the next twenty-five years to see it grow. It flourishes. Until she is confident it can survive on its own. She doesn't age a day. She then travels to a desert continent by boat, landing in a city and finding herself spending time with those society has chosen to ignore. She provides healing and comfort. And time. During her travels, you see her begin to accumulate a few acolytes, of sorts, all with sharp, defined features and horns, like the priestesses of Nepthysaket, that you would know from present. Individuals who, it seems in this society, were treated as a lower caste, and many who were given the task of dealing with the dead. You can assume that following the death of the Mistress, reverence for death slowly fades away. But not on her watch. Not with the deaths set before her, and she comes across many. We fast forward again and we see these horned priestesses following her to the middle of a vast desert, in the middle of nowhere, and they begin to build a temple to honour the old ways and perhaps bring in a few of the new. The vision starts to fade as you feel yourself pulling back into the present moment with one final look at Nepthysaket. Standing atop the roof of this temple, we see her eyes flash, a divine spark gifted to her by the Weave for someone reverent enough to hold it. Her hands move to clutch the raven skull she still wears. Proudly. And as you watch her there, her eyes fully lock onto you, and as you come back to the main space, you hear [sharp gasp] and she stares at you. She seems awake and conscious. And I'm gonna have you tell me what move you use here to try and engage with her. And Rake, as Gina considers here, I'm assuming you walk over to join.

Jannes:
Oh, yeah, for sure.

Em:
Okay.

Gina:
I think I have to be tempting fate.

Em:
Okay. So when you tempt fate with your actions, say what perilous feat you're trying to accomplish and roll 2d6. I'm going to have you tell me what you're trying to accomplish here.

Gina:
I want her to know enough, so that when we come to Temple Lybica, she'll be expecting us. But I don't want to tell her too much that it… Essentially changes the course of history.

Em:
So you're hoping to communicate with her.

Gina:
Yes.

Em:
Do you want to speak to her? ‘Cause I absolutely agree that you are tempting fate by attempting to speak with her. Pulling her out of the time stop as well. This is a mortal version of Nepthysaket.

Gina:
Right.

Em:
But if you roll for it, I'll let you do it. Why not? This is Godkiller. We have fun here.

Gina:
Yes. Yes.

Em:
Okay. So you're gonna add one for each true statement. A skilled ally is lending you a hand. I don't think so. You have no other options. To do this? I don't think so. So I'll give you that one. And you're far from any god that wishes you harm. Yes. So that's 2d6 with a plus two.

Gina:
Oh, well, I rolled a one and a six. Plus two, is nine.

Em:
Okay, so that is a seven, is nine. Oh, you are so lucky. [Gina laughs] Oh, that would have been so bad. That would have been so bad! Oh, goodness. So on a hit seven to nine, you get through it mostly unscathed. The fates spare you for now. Her eyes lock on you, and you see her, her face is in the midst of a scream, but you don't hear it and then you do. And as she begins to hear herself, seeing that things have stopped, she stops. She is frozen, stock still. You don't know whether that's because she hasn't chosen to move, or she can't, but at this point she is staring at you. She has no idea who you are.

Gina (as Ever):
“It's all right. It's okay.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Am I dead?”

Gina:
And I take my hands and I place them on either side of her face.

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Wha-”

Em:
As you touch her, you feel the radiation hit your hands, as well as the skin on your hands immediately starts to blister and burn.

Gina:
[breathy panicked sounds] I pull them away.

Em:
We did say mostly unscathed.

Gina (as Ever):
“No, no… It’s okay, it’s okay!”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't… Where is Issilus? What happened? Where is... Did it work? Did it send her? Where... What happened?”

Gina (as Ever):
“Everything is… Everything is it should be. You are alright.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Everything is not as it should be!”

Gina (as Ever):
“Everything is as… Everything is as it will be. I don't have much time. You, you don't have much time. Just take a breath with me. And remember, my name is Ever.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Ever…”

Gina (as Ever):
“His name,”

Gina:
And I look back to find Rake behind me.

Gina (as Ever):
“His name is Rake.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Rake… Rake and Ever… Who are you? Why are you here? What is this?”

Gina (as Ever):
“A long time from now. We will come to find you again.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“But I'm gonna die.”

Gina (as Ever):
“And when you hear that we are here for you, we have great work to do together, but that's not yet. But I… I’m so sorry.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Why are you sorry? I don't know you, you haven't done anything to me. Other than... There must be some incredible magic at work here, because I should be dead. If not from pushing the Matron where I could, then...”

Gina (as Ever):
“It’s just a dream.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“A dream…”

Gina (as Ever):
“It’s a dream. An important one.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I’m scared.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Me too.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“So I'm, so one day you'll come find me? Both of you?”

Em:
And she looks to you, Rake.

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“But I, I won't leave here. I don't understand.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“You will. I know it doesn't make any sense now. And it won't for a long time. But you are… So strong.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I just did what I could. I did what anyone would do.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“No. You did what only a few could. Your… Your sister is so proud of you.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Where is she?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“She will find you again one day.”

Em (as Nepthysaket): [crying]
“I don’t know why she did what she did. I wish she would have talked to me. I could have helped! I could have, we could have sat in prayer, or we could have communed with the Mistress and we could have talked about it, and she just didn't talk to me. I wouldn't have, I would have stopped her from coming on the battlefield. I wouldn't have… I wouldn’t have let her call. Why did she do it? Do you know? Why?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“There is no answer to that question that will give you any relief from the pain that you're feeling. There is no way to reason this away. Sometimes people make mistakes and they do bad things. Not because they're bad people.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Do I… What do I do now? I, I can't move. Except for this. I don't even know how this is happening. I should be- why is nothing moving? Except for you? Are you? Are you all here for… Did the Mistress send you... For me?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“The Mistress sent us for Issilus, in a way.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I don’t, I just don’t understand… I, if I am to die here, you say I will not, but I don't see how that changes, I don't see how I would leave this place. I can't move. And if things are stopped and then they start again…”

Em:
And her eyes drift over to the rift.

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I didn't plan to survive it. It took everything of my magic, I pulled on hers to make it. I don't even know where I sent her. I just had to get her out. Did I send… Did I send her somewhere safe?”

Jannes (as Rake): [hesitantly]
“No.”

Em:
Like, if she could fall over in agony, she would. She begins to, her face, like tears streaming down her face. You see incredible shame and disappointment.

Jannes (as Rake):
“Nepthysaket. Look at me. I am Rake. Son of the Feathered Mistress.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“What… She, she…”

Jannes (as Rake):
“I need you to take her place, and ferry those to the river.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Me?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“You. There is no one else who can do it.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“I’m not a god.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Not yet.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Not yet? I don’t… I’m nowhere near powerful enough to do that. I'm not even the high priestess.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“[chuckles] When we don't know if we can do it, you know what we do?”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“What’s that?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“We go on faith.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“We go on faith. Yes, yes, and I have that. I have that. I just need to hold my faith.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“We will meet again.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Anything, anything you need. You just, I don't know how, if you… But, if you call, I will answer. If you see me, if our paths cross again, please, I... Thank you. I would do anything to help.”

Gina (as Ever):
“It will be, it will be a long time from now. From this moment. But I know. I know you're patient.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“The mother superior always said that was one of my best attributes.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Time to go back to sleep.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Alright… Thank you, to the both of you. And if… If you see my sister before I do, please tell her I love her.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“She knows.”

Em (as Nepthysaket):
“Alright. Alright…”

Em:
And almost... You don't see any comfort. You see fear, but a trust in the two of you. She knows that she is all but powerless here. So she's putting her trust in you both. As her eyes close, and she… Her face doesn't resume the scream. But she falls quiet. As the, as any essence of the Weave that allowed that to happen leaves her. And Ever, from what you saw, the tree is supposed to take her. But it has not yet.

Gina:
Right… If I look down at my hands, are they... Are they burned?

Em:
There is some redness and a few blisters, but nothing that won't heal.

Gina:
And I'm at the base of the tree?

Em:
You are, against the trunk.

Gina:
I look up at it. And I don’t, I don't even think it's something that I think about doing. I think I just… I reach my hand out and I touch the base of it. I think I'd like to try and wield the power as I do.

Em:
Okay, which power would you like to wield here?

Gina:
The only one that feels right, the power of growth. From Thielia.

Em:
Okay. So when you wield a power to do something only a god can, roll 2d6 and add one for each true statement. You've done this specific act before perfectly. You've caused many things to grow. So I'll give you that one. You're desperate for this to work. Are you desperate?

Gina:
I think, it's supposed to have happened already. Right? It's supposed to have taken her and it hasn't yet?

Em:
That's correct.

Gina:
And I… And if I don't? If it doesn't happen, and we walk through that portal? Everything dies.

Em:
Everything dies.

Gina:
Then yes, I am desperate.

Em:
Okay. So you can mark one strain. And, you're close to a shrine, lair or domain of the god you took this power from. Yes. So that is gonna be a plus two, plus three actually.

Gina:
You can't see that, but that's, I've rolled a six and a three. Which is a nine.

Em:
Mmhmm.

Gina:
Plus three is a twelve.

Em:
Is a twelve. Okay. So on an overkill, ten plus, the GM will describe how you also drain, terrify, or wreck what's around you. Oh goodness.

Gina:
I think Rake would see Ever start to glow. But it starts out subtle, like the edges of her are softer, lighter. Like she's standing in front of a sunlit window, and it's in her hair and you see the palms of her hands are alight with gold. And I touch the trunk of this tree, and as I do the glow intensifies. My entire body is now shining like... Like sunlight on the water surface before it flows from me through my arm through my hand, my fingertips, and into this tree.

Em:
Rake, you're pulled back to that moment in the Dreamscape. She could light up the whole night. She is radiant. And you get the sense here, Rake, that she is giving some of herself to this tree. You see as the radiance moves down her arm and into this giant willow trunk. You see her... There is more tiredness on her face. Ever has given a part of herself to this tree. And on this overkill, I am not gonna pull a punch here, and Ever, you are going to be perpetually at one strain. No matter how much healing you do, you will never get that part of you back. So when divine approaches divine. This trunk is as big and wide as Thielia’s tree in the Seanmathir. Before I tell you what happens, I'm gonna have you roll to recognize a god. When you want to recognize the signs or the influence of a god of the Cradle, roll 2d6. And you're going to add one for each true statement. You're in or near their domain. You are touching this tree, so yes. You are familiar with their gospel. No. And it would be bad if you didn't know. [sigh] I don't think so. I don't think the tree wants to hurt you. It is grateful. So that is a plus one.

Gina:
Well, I rolled two sixes.

Em:
Mmhmm. You did. Okay. So on another overkill, ten plus, you realize your divinity is actively trespassing against them. The GM will say how. So I think as you clock that your divinities are the same, I'm gonna give you the information about this tree first, and then I'm gonna tell you how you trespass against it. You are familiar with all of the gods of the Cradle, yet you realize you are not in the Cradle. Some part of this world at this period of time will become the Cradle, but it is not that yet. And so of course, when you think of divinity, your mind pulls back to the pantheon that you know. And of course your mind settles on Thielia, wondering if this is an effigy to her, or one of her creations. But as you place your hand on it and give it a part of yourself, feeling the warmth of this bark, despite the barrenness that will soon follow here in Manta, you realize this tree is maybe older than Thielia. You feel this, you see the same golden banding, but much smaller. The wood is the same colour as the rich brown of her skin. Perhaps part of this tree was used to create her. Your hand finds a divot in the tree, almost made for a hand. You feel your consciousness leave your body as you are drawn down through the roots that spread deep underground, down, down, down so far that they cross a planar barrier.

Your mind swims as you come through to this shadowed area, a horizon of monochromatic gray as you see a tree of similar size connected to this one. Planar trees. Upholding the fabric of the multiverse, anchors used by the Weave itself, upon which to rotate. This is Thall Bask, the Tree of Life. You don't know the name of its counterpart, but you know that without both of them, the multiverse would likely be at risk of collapsing on itself. It would not be able to uphold the division of the planes, things would start to bleed together. You have never known a tree like this within the Cradle that you know now. So somewhere along the line, both this tree and the other, was destroyed. And very likely, that that was one of the things that led to the River drying up. The Weave of magic could not uphold itself if the planes began to all flow together. There is a hesitancy. The tree wants to let you use your power here. But it's confused and scared. You are of it. The divine spark you hold is of it, yet it has not given that to you. It's like it's waiting for your permission to do its work. It has… Your divinity is trespassing against this tree because without your permission, this tree will not do what it's supposed to do. Unless you choose to let it. This tree should answer to no one. But now it answers to you.

Gina:
I close my eyes and I move closer to the tree, and I lay my forehead against it. And I say out loud, remembering back to when I was a little girl, in the Saileach, with Davos, and I just say,

Gina (as Ever):
“It's very lovely to meet you.”

Gina:
And silently, it's just in my mind, through the power of Thielia, I try in some way to… Give that permission.

Em:
Okay. As you do so, letting down the barrier between you and this tree, between you and Thall Bask. Rake, would feel this too as you feel the ground begin to rumble slightly, despite time being stopped, as roots dig deeper and deeper from the tree. They permeate the thick ground. And you feel the sense of new saplings begin to grow somewhere deep, deep below, leaves unfurling for the first time as they push up through soil. There will be a lush grove somewhere below what will be the ruins of Manta. And simultaneously you see the wood begin to grow around Nepthysaket. Her face is more contented, softly resigned. After speaking to you and feeling that she'd done all she could, even though she knows she failed, she didn't send the Mistress somewhere safe. But perhaps safer than here. The tree begins to encase her and one bow begins to move up into her hands, and settles. You see it thins itself so that if needed, this piece could break off, as it pulls her deeper and deeper into the trunk of the tree until you can no longer see her. She is encased. As you had seen.

Gina:
And I think every time I use this power, when the divinity of Thielia is flowing through me, I just feel… Peace. And it doesn't last, but right now it's still here.

Em:
Rake, as you see her hand leave the tree after Nepthysaket has been encased, you get kind of that full scope of the heaviness she now carries, and as she turns back to look at you, you hear that tick of the metronome, louder this time, coming from the archway.

Jannes (as Rake):
“We have to go.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Right.”

Gina:
I stand up.

Jannes:
I think Rake would actually come over and put out his hand to help you up.

Gina:
I take it. And I think I'm still, I think I'm still glowing just, just a little bit. Just remnants of it. I stand up, allow you to pull me up.

Jannes:
And he takes, I think he takes your hand, your glowing hand. And he brings it to the side of his face. And he places it on his cheek. He sort of leans against it.

Jannes (as Rake):
“If only I had the ability to stop time a little earlier. We could have stayed in that bookshop forever.”

Gina:
You see her look at you. You see she opens her mouth to say something and… Doesn't.

Gina (as Ever):
“We have to go.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Come.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Are you ready?”

Jannes (as Rake):
“As ready as I’ve been for any of this.”

Jannes:
And I walk over to the arch, holding your hand.

Em:
Its opacity shifts and swirls as you see the expanse of the liminal stretch out before you. The soft, steady pace of the metronome, under Ungal's purview, still remaining. And, I would like to ask the two of you now, Where do you plan to go? You will have to wield a power to get there. But where would you like to go?

Jannes:
I think Rake would suggest Hood, just knowing who is after them in the city of Glass. Hood seems removed enough that they might not run into other people who might be looking for them.

Jannes (as Rake):
“I think we should try and avoid Glass. We could make for Hood. I've been there quite a few times before and I'm familiar with it. They have a temple to Nepthysaket.”

Gina (as Ever):
“Okay. I trust you.”

Jannes (as Rake):
“Alright.”

Jannes:
And I am going to wield a power to try and reactivate this archway.

Em:
Okay. So when you wield a power to do something only a god can, roll 2d6 and add one for each true statement. You've done the specific act before perfectly. Yeah. You've manipulated time before. You're getting quite good at it, actually. Are you desperate for this to work?

Jannes:
I'm gonna say… Yes, just because it finally feels to him like he has a plan. He has some sort of semblance of an idea that they could actually pull this off, and that all falls apart if he can't deliver on this. So I'm gonna say yes. He's desperate.

Em:
Okay. And you're close to a shrine, lair, or domain of the god you took this power from. You are standing at the archway. So that is going to be a plus three for this one.

Jannes:
I rolled a six, plus three is a nine.

Em:
You lucky dog. So on a hit, you do it. The two of you step through this archway. And the second your feet leave it, it's almost as if you feel the entire world behind you speed up and continue. There is a concussive blast of force against the opacity of the door. It does not permeate, but you hear almost a sonic boom echo out from the other side. You cannot see it if you're not looking at it, as you begin to drift forward in the liminal towards Hood.

Jannes:
I think, and as they start to drift towards Hood… I think there's a moment where… Rake turns back to where they've come from and is looking over his shoulder. And as they approach the arch where… The secondary arch of their destination, right before they pass through it, he turns and steps out of the… The stream that's carrying them towards the archway.

Em:
Hmm. His hand drops out of yours, as you continue to move towards Hood, Ever.

Gina:
How fast am I moving?

Em:
How fast do you wanna move? You are on a set path.

Gina:
If I feel his hands slip out of mine, I turn to him.

Gina (as Ever):
“What are you doing?”

Em:
And Rake, I'm gonna have you… Act impulsively here. You want to do what I think you're trying to do, I'm going to have you act impulsively here. So when you act impulsively, describe the emotion that drives you, and answer one. The GM will tell you something you didn't notice until now as they answer the other. So the questions are, what advantage do you seize, and what trouble hits you hard and fast?

Jannes:
The emotion I think that is driving Rake in this moment is… Is love for Ever. He's finally starting to believe that she might survive all of this. And he needs to know more. He needs to know that after all of it is done, that she will be happy. And I think… The advantage that I seize is that because I control the very flow of time itself in this moment, the time it takes, from Ever feeling his hand leave hers, and her looking over her shoulder at him, that split second between those two things, is a lifetime for someone who can control time.

Em:
Hmm.

Jannes:
And when she sees him. It's already done.

Em:
And the trouble that hits you hard and fast, is that when you spend a lifetime away and learn more, it changes you. So whatever you go to do, she might not know what it is, but she will intimately see how it has changed you. So, his hand slips from yours, for a second. There is a space of a couple inches where you feel the Weave move itself between your hands, as he grips your hands once more. As you hurdle forward towards the gate. Back to your own time in the Cradle.

[Light & Dark: Series Theme by Sean McRoberts]

Em:
Godkiller: Balance is performed by Em Carlson, Gina Susanna & Jannes Wessels. This season’s dramaturge is Tim Carlson. Special thanks to our campaign artist, Mischi, who you can find @Mischiart on twitter! Our main theme for this episode, Light & Dark, was composed by Sean McRoberts. Music and effects by Epidemic Sound. For more stories, come follow us everywhere at @blackwaterdnd, and make sure to check out our Main Campaign on Monday nights at 8pm PST at twitch.tv/blackwaterdnd. To play your own campaign of Godkiller and dive into your own divinity, go support Godkiller by purchasing the ashcan on itch.io today, with the print version published soon by Evil Hat Productions. This show is made possible by our sponsors who graciously support us playing pretend and having feelings about it. We are grateful to be sponsored by Heroforge, who offer fully customizable miniatures made with their online 3D character creator! Head on over and design your own Godkiller, and get them printed in a variety of materials, including colour printing options! With new content added each week, check out www.heroforge.com to start bringing your character to life! This show is also proudly sponsored by Moonbeam, a better and safer way to stream! Dive into Realms for vibrant community hubs where creators keep 100% of what they earn while protected by Pyxis, a revolutionary moderation tool that learns and adapts to your boundaries. So check them out and join Moonbeam today! Finally, we’re thankful for our Patrons for joining us on our second journey through the Cradle. You too can come join us on Patreon, where you can check out behind the scenes info, our talkback show Chatwater, as well as exclusive Godkiller bonus content and so much more. Head on over to patreon.com/blackwaterdnd for all the info. See you next time, heretics, and to all the gods out there, be safe!